Parenting and Triggers
If you have buttons…..
It’s hard to be a regulating presence if a child pushes your buttons. Some of us don’t even know that we have buttons until we start parenting. If for instance you need to be in complete control due to a loss of control early in life you will need to work on that issue before you can be a co-regulator. In other words if you strongly react to a child’s negative behaviors you will not be able to be a calming influence and then a teacher. You may just automatically react with punishment.
In this video clip Dan Siegel talks about personal healing that can change the way we relate to others. This is especially important for parents dealing with children who have developmental trauma. An inexpensive start might be some self-reflection using his book “Parenting From the Inside Out”.